Artificial Tears
by BeeBella
Summary: When Nessie thinks her uncle Emmett doesn't cry at sad movies because he's scared to, Emmett goes to extreme lengths to prove he's not scared of anything. Movie time with Uncle Emmett. One-Shot. "I can tell Daddy you’re not scared to cry at movies now."


**This was just something that came to me today, and demanded to be wrote down. **

**I don't own anything. **

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**Emmett's POV**

"Emmett, please don't watch a horror movie with her _again_." Bella stressed for the fifth time.

"Bella, I won't." I promised, pushing her out of the door.

"Emmett," She sighed. "I will personally throw you in a fire if you do."

"I won't. Now go, you're going to be late." I said, now throwing her out of the door.

She walked to the car, glaring back at me. She hated leaving me to look after Nessie. You let a three year old watch _one_ movie about zombies and you're automatically a bad influence. It wasn't my fault the zombies happened to be a similar shade of pale as us, or that she ran away from Edward screaming 'he's going to kill me' for a week. I blamed that one on the kid's memory. She never forgot anything. Ever.

"Emmett, you'd better not. I've only just convinced her that I am in fact _not_ going to eat her." Edward frowned, stepping out of the house with an empty box labelled 'kitchen'.

"It's not my fault your kid has such a good memory." I snickered.

"We'll be heading back as soon as we've finished moving Charlie in to his new home." Edward warned, kissing Nessie on the forehead and leaving.

Alice had dragged both Rosalie and Jasper shopping with her, saying she was in need of some new clothes. The real reason she needed new clothes was because she had forced half of them over to Bella. I was supposed to be going with them, too. Rosalie was adamant on dragging me with her, but Bella and Edward were moving Charlie into his new house so they needed someone to babysit Nessie. I had offered to do it the moment they asked. Jasper was about to offer too, but Alice glared at him with those deathly eyes which told him he'd better do as she says… or else.

Rosalie had ignored me all morning, huffing about how she was now stuck with the two lovebirds on her own. Alice had offered to buy her some new shoes, and that cheered her up straight away.

By about Ten in the morning everybody was out of the house, leaving me to babysit little Nessie. Usually she'd just go and play with her dolls and leave me to watch some football. On the odd occasion, she'd wanted to watch a movie with me. But I wasn't going to sit down with her and watch a cartoon one about pink and blue ponies. I'd be scarred for life it I did. That's why we usually ended up watching a gory horror film. But due to a forced promise to both Edward and Bella, I couldn't even so much as mention the words 'horror movie' to her.

I had brought a few normal boring chick flick movies down just in case Nessie did want to watch one. There was a good choice of about twenty DVD's, so she couldn't complain. Nessie would just pick one which had a colourful front cover, not caring what the movie was actually about. She'd enjoy it all the same. Nessie was one of those kids who enjoyed anything. She'd even enjoyed watching those horror movies… until the day after. Again, not my fault.

Nessie ended up playing on Edward's piano for a little while. At first she played some pretty awesome songs that Edward had taught her. She was a little genius when it came to playing the piano. She was very musical; playing the piano was like second nature to her. After a while, though, she got bored and just started hitting random keys. Pretty much like a normal kid her age would do. After she was sure she had broken one or two of the keys, she came complaining to me.

"Uncle Emmett," She said, her head flopped back in exasperation. "I'm so bored."

"You want something to eat? It's lunch time, already." I asked, standing up.

"Daddy says not to eat when I'm bored, I'll end up like you if I do." She giggled, running away.

"Hey!" I said, running after her. That kid was fast, she kept me running for a good twenty minutes before I actually caught her.

"Can we watch a movie, Uncle Emmett?" She asked, once I had caught her.

When she looked at me with them adorably huge brown eyes I couldn't say no. She was a smart little munchkin and knew how to use those eyes of hers against people. It only ever worked on Jasper, Edward, Carlisle and I. The girls seamed to resist it a lot more than we did.

"I suppose," I huffed with a smile. "Go choose one from down there."

I pointed to a pile of DVD's on the floor and watched her run towards them. She looked excitedly at them all, struggling over which one to pick. She picked up two and ran back over to me with them both.

"Can we watch two?" She asked, hopeful. I couldn't say no to her, so I ended up getting myself stuck in a chick flick movie session.

The first movie she chose to put on was something along the lines of _My Girl_. It was actually quite sad. If I were a human, I probably would have bawled my eyes out. But I was lucky enough to be a vampire who couldn't shed one single tear. I'd never live it down if Edward or Jasper found out. Nessie told them _everything_. When the movie finished I looked over at Nessie. She was sat on the sofa next to me, hugging her blanket. Puddles of tears escaped her eyes, and she sobbed for a good few minutes. She looked so adorable.

"Uncle Emmett, w-why didn't you cry?" She asked between sobs.

"I can't cry, Nessie. You know that." I smiled, patting her head.

"Everybody can cry." She said.

"We can't munchkin. Didn't daddy tell you this last week?" I asked with one eyebrow raised.

Nessie seamed to have a problem coming to terms with the fact that we couldn't cry. She refused to believe any of us, thinking we were actually just _afraid _to cry. She'd use the exact same pep talk Edward would give her when she was crying. Telling us it would be alright, and that we didn't have to be afraid. Edward burst out in laughter every time she tried to reason with one of us, until she started on him with it. Edward got a right telling off from her. Edward held in a laugh which threatened to escape each time she told him off for laughing at us.

"I just think you're scared." She teased, throwing her teddy at me.

"I am not scared." I said defensively. I hated people thinking I was scared of something.

"Prove it." She said, sticking her tongue out at me.

"How?" I asked, willing to do anything to show her that her uncle Emmett was not afraid of anything… except mice, they're kind of freaky, if you think about it. She didn't need to know that, though.

"You gotta cry at this next movie, it's very, very sad." She smiled as she hopped off of the sofa and put in the next DVD.

"Fine." I said, sticking my tongue out at her.

I had no idea how I was going to do this. It wasn't physically possible for me to produce tears at all. Instead, I tried getting used to the idea of Nessie thinking I was scared of crying. It wasn't going to work. Emmett Cullen was not afraid of crying. I could cry like a baby if I really wanted to… I hoped.

The title screen came on, showing that the DVD was called _A Walk to Remember_. I'd sat down and watched this movie with Rosalie before, and knew just how much we both wanted to cry at the ending. I'd never seen Rosalie get that close to an emotional breakdown over a movie before. She threatened to kill me if I told anyone. She loved being known as the badass Cullen who'd kick anybody's butt if need be.

"Uncle Emmett, press play!" Nessie shouted, a pout on her face.

I pressed play quickly, wanting to avoid her little kid tantrums. Even as a half vampire child, she was very well known for her little human tendencies. She hadn't skipped the terrible two's… or grown out of them. We could handle it, though. Jasper usually calmed her down, whilst Bella told her, in her words, to 'Knock it off'. Nessie would laugh and act as if nothing had happened then.

As the movie played I the thought of ways I could make myself cry. I knew the chances of finding something were very slim. There was really only one way I could pull it off and that was to make some fake tears. But I couldn't pull that off, could I?

"Want some popcorn, kiddo?" I asked, walking towards the kitchen.

"Yes," She smiled giddily. I waited for her to use her manners, even us vampires had to use them, Carlisle would kick out butts if we didn't. "Please."

I went in the kitchen and made some popcorn. Whilst that was busy popping in the background I got an empty bottle of ear drops for dogs out of the cabinet. Rosalie had gotten some as a joke towards Jacob, but Esme emptied them as soon as Nessie discovered how they worked. She kept popping them in Jacob's eyes whenever he was asleep. It was quite amusing. I poured some water into them and finished making the popcorn. I handed Nessie the bowl of popcorn and hid the drops next to me.

When the sad parts came I tilted my head back and applied a good amount of drops, at vampire speed, to my eyes. By the time the movie ended, my whole face was covered in artificial tears. Nessie turned to me, a grin on her face.

"Uncle Emmett, you're crying!" She giggled, poking my face to check if the water droplets were real.

"Happy now, you little rascal?" I asked, throwing a popcorn kernel at her.

"Yep. I can tell Daddy you're not scared to cry at movies now." She said proudly.

If I could cry, I would have then. There was no way any of the others could find out. They'd tease me for life.

"How about we keep this to ourselves?" I asked, desperately.

"Nope." She said with an evil smile.

I picked her up quickly, tickling her. She laughed uncontrollably, her little legs kicking in the air. She'd managed to boot me one in the face a few times, too. I pulled her onto my shoulders, making sure I had a firm grip on her and raced around the room.

"Uncle Emmett, put me down!" She shrieked between laughs.

"Are you gonna tell?" I asked, racing around still.

"Yes!" She squeaked with a grin.

The door opened then, and Bella looked at me with those evil eyes. The ones that said she was going to kill me.

"What are you doing to my child?" She shrieked, dropping her bag.

"We were just having fun, lighten up." I joked, putting Nessie down and throwing some popcorn at Bella.

"Yeah, mommy, lighten up." Nessie giggled copying me.

"You always manage to teach my kid _something_, Emmett." Bella smiled, picking Nessie up.

"What did he teach her this time?" Edward asked as he entered the house.

"Daddy!" Nessie called, leaning to him.

"Hey, Nessie. What did you do today?" He asked, taking her out of Bella's arms.

The whole family came in then. Jacob included. I was pretty sure I'd never live this one down. Nessie was enjoying every minute of it.

"We watched movies… and Uncle Emmett cried." She laughed, proudly.

"He did?" Edward asked confused.

Stupid fake tears. I knew nothing good would come out of using water in an ear drops for dogs bottle. Edward raised his eyebrows at me and chuckled to himself when he heard what I was thinking.

"Yep. He cried like a baby at _A Walk to Remember_." She giggled again.

Rosalie snorted behind me, as did Jasper and Bella. Alice just looked very amused. See, I would never live this down. Not even in one hundred years.

"Need a tissue, Emmett?" Bella asked, a huge grin on her face.

"Funny." I grunted.

"Daddy, why don't you and Uncle Jasper cry at that movie?" Nessie asked when everybody had finished laughing at me.

"Because your Daddy and I aren't big wimps like your Uncle Emmett." Jasper laughed, an even bigger grin on his face.

"But Jacob cried at it, too. Does that mean he's a wimp as well?" Nessie asked, confused.

Everybody looked at Jake then who reddened in the face. The huge blushing dog turned to walk out of the door before any of us could react. I didn't doubt that Rosalie had a few saved for later. Jacob wouldn't be living that one down, either.

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**I loved writing this. I don't know why, but I did. Special dedication, to Mrs Emacular, who adores Emmett in ways too strange for words. Another one to Giselle, who listened to me ramble on about this and then laughed at the cheesy parts. **


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